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Joined 9 months ago
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Cake day: December 24th, 2023

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  • People are saying get hobbies… And yep.

    I’ve been very “successful” on the dating apps, but they almost always resulted in a one night stand or a fling for a few weeks. You meet someone with the expectation of romance and you never form a friendship because you see eachother as romantic partners first. That may work for some people, but I see it as a loss of foundation. When I don’t have a history with someone before being intimate, I tend to feel overwhelmed with the anxiety of expectations.

    For me I found swing dancing was a great way to meet people. It’s fun, there isn’t necessarily an expectation of romance, but it also is a mood where romance can happen. I also thought to myself “I can either sit on my couch high AF while feeling like shit as I swipe left and right while trying to hold a virtual conversation that mostly goes nowhere, or I can go dancing. If I strike out on tinder, I feel like I wasted an evening. If I strike out dancing, fuck it I had a great time anyway!”



  • Maybe you can help me out.

    I see lots of folks here who are programmers or have a ton of knowledge on ways to get around the big 5 to maintain privacy, but as a layman with only so much time in the day, it’s hard to avoid taking the path of least resistance when using the Internet.

    I am a musician with a public profile on Instagram, and many of my friends who are also artists use TikTok or YouTube to get their exposure. It’s kind of a necessity if you want to simply book a gig at a venue (they will ask for your social media handles to see how many followers you have to determine if it’s even worth having you on).

    As artists we are also not flush with cash to pay for all the privacy software or VPNs. On top of that, so much of our information is already out there, I’m not sure how we’d even start reeling it back in.